WAFFLEZ' BLOG-SPACE
Occassional big brain thots.
Hey there fellow netizen(s)!
As per my promise from the Sept.26 blog-box-thing...
I got into the Illustration BFA program! WEE
To be honest with you, I don't feel a lot of joy over it. I feel like so much other stuff is going on with my life, it's hardly an achievement. Maybe also because the school is weird and getting the acceptance letter doesn't feel rewarding for ANYONE in the program, lolz.
Unfortunately, I won't be able to attend for a while. American college and lack of dabloons, alla that... Still! I guess I'll have some time to work on personal pieces and commit more time to a game art portfolio! I'm also going thru heartbreak and loss </3, so I fear for my sanity points in the months to come, away from my program and my friends.
Oh well, what can you do. I'm just hoping to continue to remain strong. Have some scheduled moping time here and there, ya know
I wish you strength and courage and kindness, to self and others, my dear reader. Have a good night.
Been thinking about this one for a while, but it's mostly spurred on by a recent thing-
Friendships inevitably falter. Some from tough situations that split people, others after a gentle while of reduced contact.
You know, maybe you stopped checking in and keeping up, maybe you still see the updates they post, maybe they see yours. Not much else
I've definitely both cut friendships, and had them drift slowly
Openin' up time, I've definitely struggled with befriending people as an immigrant in a foreign place, for a long-ass while. A lot of friendships seemed surface-level to me, and I always seek more over time
And 'ey, I'm no stranger to things not working out. We meet TONS of people daily: that cool person you passed on the way to school/work, that one person who sits next to you sometimes, people you've met at community events or while doing your hobby. Not all of them will become YOUR people, that's just life. Way too many cool kids out there to add to your close friends list or whateva
This one's new to me though.
Drifting Away, With Effort.
Trying to put consistent efforts into reaching out to the awesome people I've befriended, making plans. I love gift-giving, btw ! Elaborate stuff that shows care is always on the table if I can make it happen :D
But sometimes people just don't reach back. Noticing this pattern and trying to navigate it not very intuitive, personally-
Like, hey dude, I thought we were real friends now. I thought all those hangouts and awesome talks meant that you enjoyed my company too
And so the person drifts away, even with effort involved. Man, I feel like it sux even more than cut contact. Keep trying, but did that ever matter to begin with?
This happened to me again recently, the original time being a year or two ago. I try to keep up, and hey, we both got a life. Adult shit is stressful and sucks. But if I never message first again, if I don't extend the invite, if I don't try to carry the friendship - it falls apart. Did that ever matter to begin with? Did this frienship?
It did to me, actually.
And so I sit here and look at their posts, and they like mine back
Drifting Away, With Effort.
Hey there! Dunno if anyone checks this, but I thought I'd check in :)
Here's Wafflez, comin' in live from her upper div Art History class, sipping a mediocre tea drink from a nearby cafe LOLZ
Been a whole ass WHILE, don't really know why I never wrote during the summer...I really didn't do all that much.
I guess once you've made a site look all pretty, you don't see the need to update it anymore. Ugh!! I miss my days of being focused on this >:/ I'm doing lotz of other projects tho!! Mostly still chipping away at my 3rd year college portfolio
...Speaking of which, I'll know whether I got into my program in just a month...WHEW. I'll have to update then >:) That's a promise to self, as well as any reader willing to stick around hehe
I surprisingly don't have too many blog-appropriate updates. UHH I'm painting a flesh orb for one of my classes?
May or may not take up updating this during lectures, but I definitely promise that 1-month update!
- Wafflez out <3
Hear me out! I know a lot of people shit on OW, and honestly? Super fair, especially in the context of Blizzard...
And whoever's reading this should know by now that I'm a niche game lover anyways :p
BUT, inspired by Venture's release, I just wanted to say I frickin LOVE their design team, whoever those folx are.
Of course, queer characters are not a revolutionary game concept, but for a AAA game studio who's known for an audience of some real toxics?
I respect the bravery, LOLZ. It's also awesome to see a genderqueer OW fan be cast as the amazing VA for Venture!!
YYyeaah they still have pretty bad monetary practices that don't respect the player base, but I'm thankful for amazing artists, writers and actors that commit to making the game better with each creative addition <3
Here's to hoping that we'll see more cool ass rep in gaming, and maybe even an artist-led revolution? Nah, unlikely... But perhaps???
I can't believe my blog posts have essentially turned into monthly updates. Whoops :D
Better this way tho, cause my original blog posts were too good to beat every single damn time. Man I love being a perfectionist and setting high standards for meself </3
Anyways, my drawing tablet broke recently!! I'm pretty sure it's my abuse of the pen buttons, and now the pressure has completely gone to shit :(
I'm using one of them regular tablets with Clip Studio on it now!! It's pretty great, but it's making me doubt whether I can produce the same quality of work on a portable non-PC device. God I fucking hope so...
I think it's kind of funny that an Ipad artist friend of mine has dreamed of a screen drawing tablet for a while now, and I've wanted a portable set-up. We both got what we wanted, but I dunno if she's quite full of doubt for her abilities with new tech as I am :"D
I might put a quick Wrench piece up in the Artz tab by the end of the month...Maybe I'll even make an OCs dump page...
Be ready, and keep on creating despite the challenges >:)) (I know I'm trying lolz)
Phew, a month of no blogposts... I didn't even notice, to be honest!
I have, however, been working on making website changes, among other things >:)
I think it's kinda funny that there's no change log, since I see a lot of people having those. I'm an artist, not a coder, so I think I get a pass. Plus, it creates more pressure. Oh shit! I haven't made any updates in ages!! Yk?
I did, however, finally make the 'Festo (aka my website manifesto) work and look sorta cohesive!
It took my brain so long to organize it. It was, again, a lot of pressure to make something readable and... manifesto-ey.
I hope it's enjoyable and inspiring, maybe :). I love me a good website manifesto!!
Ran it by a couple friends, and they seem to like it, so I'm satisfied...For now.
Net revival takes a LOT, so we shall take our lil steps :] Thanks for being here with me thru this.
This one was inspired by me seeing a post about Duolingo layoffs, of all things.
You'd think that Duo management decisions has nothing to do with the AI art issue, and that's where I stop you!!! To tell you all about my big brain connections here.
I'd hope that if you're here, you also have great(or at least basic) respect for artists and, well, any creatives...and workers in general. Lemme summarize that post for ya:
"Duolingo laid off a shit ton of translators, just so they could have the new and cool AI doing most of their work!"
...Because the complexity of translation between multiple languages is so EASILY understood by AI, over proficient or native speakers, amirite?
Anyhow, we're diving deeper and deeper into the AI hole with any new inventions and decisions and automations done by corps. I think that's terrifying. Yea maybe it's the future and we're all silly geese stuck trying to build 90s core websites that don't feel soulless. What do we know?
I just hope there will still be enough people left to do that HUMAN work, at the end of the day. And enough people left to appreciate it.
Got thinking as to why I don't watch enough shows and barely EVER read.
The answer is hyperfixations, btw. They last way longer and are full of way more passion when it comes to games for me. Why?
The simple answer is interactivity, and esp in open world games you're dragged in and are part of the space so immediately, compared to having to build up immersion yourself in books or other visual media.
Not my answer, however. It's the HOME-spaces.
An HQ, a shitty apartment as the main option your poor ass can afford at the start, a hideout to come back to, etc. And these HOME spaces are usually something you get to fill out. I think that's so wonderful.
Made a new ally? BAM, they hang out at your fast-travel Home area and give you silly one-liners. A piece of memorabilia from a quest or mission? Over there, in the corner. It's your damn space. And as you progress, whether you just fill it out with more trinkets and stuffz, or share the place with people that have come to be loyal and loving on your journey: it's your space!!!
And you get to feel the atmosphere, be present, feel safe, take a break from journeying and see how far you've come. A HOME space is present in all of my favorite games. I'm so thankful for them. For making me feel safe, living, loving and being loved.
I hope we all get a HOME-space in life, one day < 3
Here we are!! Hi again to anyone reading this :)
You're either a friend who I sent the linkity link to, or a stranger on the internet. Either way, thanks for lending me your eyes and a minute of your time.
I've never written in a blog, or... literally coded one myself?? Jesus, younger Wafflez would lose her shit :D Either way, I'm having an insane amount of fun with this. When I say engineers (including hardware/software ones) are also creatives just like us, the artists, I do mean it. The amount of problem-solving I've been doing these past few days as a clueless script kiddie is more than my average piece of art, tbh. It's very fulfilling, for me.
Either way, full of joy and excitement, I will continue fuck around and find out with this website project. Here's to a good 2024!
I wrote a line I wanted at the end of my first blogpost beforehand, so here it is:
I'm so proud of myself. I think he'd be proud of me too.